The Vice List: Champagne Problems
I was real time theory building about whether the server hated me or not.
My glass was never empty, and he made sure of it.
I went out for dinner with my girlfriends, and the food and drinks were flowing. The table filled up fast with oysters, tuna tartare, ricotta triangoli, and glasses of sparkling.
It was one of those nights where one bottle fluidly turned into another.
Our first server was excellent. She made sure we had the perfect combination of food, drinks, and privacy to gossip.
The gossip was hot, and we had things to say. More alcohol means more gossip. It’s girl math.
Then another server took over.
He was perfectly fine, but he kept our glasses continuously topped up.
A full glass of sparkling sounds like a dream, but it started to feel like a hospitable way to say, “drink up”.
I couldn’t tell if he was being attentive or trying to rush us.
Impeccable service or subtle threats. There were a few hints.
He came over to ask if we were finished while we were still picking away at the radicchio, and he kept refilling our glasses. Not empty. Not even low. Just permanently full to keep things moving whether we were ready or not.
To be fair, the restaurant is a hot spot, and we showed up late for our reservation, ordered multiple bottles, and were the last to leave, so it may have been merited.
He may have known what he was dealing with.
We finished that bottle in record time.
I Like Champagne In A Glass, And Now I Like It In A Wedge
I was invited to a charcuterie party, so I went to the store to pick out a special cheese to add to the board, and there it was.
Two of my favourite words: champagne cheddar.
Champagne cheddar is English cow’s milk cheese that is aged for 12 months and infused with champagne. It has a creamy texture with sweet, fruity notes.
I admittedly knew none of this, and bought it solely for the name, but it lived up to the hype.
Unfortunately for my friends, I didn’t end up bringing the cheese to the charcuterie party because I ate it. When I went back to get another, it was gone.
The one that got away.
So I pivoted and brought Chablis instead.
It was probably for the best because there was so much cheese that the host was sending people home with it like we were trick or treating.
The Watch List
🚨 TW: Spoilers ahead
Hannah Montana 20th Anniversary Special
20 years of Hannah Montana. Time to book a Botox appointment. The Hannahversary was basically (Miley’s Version), and Miley Cyrus deserves all her flowers, pun intended.
Jury Duty Presents: Company Retreat
Cringy, but required viewing. I can’t look away, even when I want to. Anthony better be booked and busy after this because he is a true professional. Release the texts he sent to the group chat while filming immediately.
The Bravoverse
March MANness is down to the final two: West Wilson and Rob Rausch! March MANness is an annual bracket that is run by Two Judgey Girls to crown the hottest man in the Bravosphere. Rob is obviously hotter, but I had to vote for West because his personality and fashion are better. Plus, his breakfast casserole slaps.
RHONJ
Teresa, Melissa, and Dolores have been confirmed for the next season of the Real Housewives of New Jersey. I’m personally over the Gorga family drama, and think the “reconciliation” at BravoCon was merely for the show. Put this franchise on pause and bring back Miami.
RHOBH
If Amanda were a better Housewife, she would have used the Pinocchio joke as an opportunity to clap back at Boz, but instead she sat there with her bad posture sulking. Why does Kyle even care about it? It is Housewifery 101. All of us praying that Amanda is a one season Housewife.
Summer House
Andy said this was Kyle’s worst episode in all 10 seasons, but it was West’s best. KJ is also so precious.
Drink up until the next time,
✨💖 Rebecca 💖✨